If there is one thing consultants like —as much as three bullet points, assessments, and roadmaps—it’s windowpane charts. Amanda explains in chapter 2 of the Art of Asking – that the difference between asking and begging is mutual respect. I’ve taken that idea and translated it into an understanding of “worthiness” which I plotted on the X-axis.

Then I started thinking about entitlement, and folks who don’t ask but rather assume and demand, which made me include a Y-axis for respect and understanding with regards to the client.

Categories of Askingbox_ask

I think it’s worth meditating on the difference energetically between each of these 4 states. Only asking as an invitation involved connection. Artists intuitively understand connection – when we make art it is always, always, always, an exchange between what we make and what the audience perceives.


  • To move to the right you need to understand and cultivate your value
  • To move up you need to invest in your clients, your relationships, understanding their needs, and effectively communicate and deliver value.
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